Saturday, October 14, 2006

Seek and ye shall find: The sequel...

It is time once again to take a brief look at some of the search engine queries that have led a few intrepid explorers from the furthest reaches of cyberspace to this desolate planetoid of a blog…

Retirement nudist: probably just someone looking for a wrinkle friendly environment in which to spend their golden years.

Anne Heche alien abduction: Hey Anne, you remember when you had that little psychotic “episode” and thought you’d been abducted by aliens? Ah, good times…good times.

Deepthroat techniques: this one has actually come up so often that I think someone should open up a school dedicated to teaching it. I’m thinking of Madonna for Head Mistress.

Preparation H sniffing: this query raises the question is the sniffing to take place before the famed hemorrhoid cream is applied or after…sadly, we may never know.

Buy lederhosen for dachshunds: I’m guessing that those are something you can’t just buy off the rack…you've got to get them custom made. Anyway, the very idea of a dachshund in lederhosen is both disturbing and comical…it’s distomical!

Skinny dipping Yellowstone: Yeah, just don’t do it in Old Faithful. I wonder if this person would like to meet ‘retirement nudist’? At the very least they share an interest in public nudity.

What Hugh Hefner eats: you don’t need me for this one, just insert your own oral sex joke here.

Eliminating the smell of mothballs: I can only assume that they are talking about the commercially available product for protecting clothing and not the tiny testicles of actual moths…but I could be wrong.


Diesel said...

Deepthroat techniques was me. I'm making a documentary about that thing that hangs down in the back of your throat, and I was wondering how they got some of those camera angles.

Anonymous said...

Anne heche...

Whatever happened to that crazy ass bitch?


Dan said...

This post is uncanny! The way I intially found your blog was by going to (now called simply and asking the following question:

Does Hugh Hefner really smell like Preparation H after Anne Heche deepthroats him while skinny dipping in a retirement community of nudists?

And here I was!

Jenna Howard said...

How do you eliminate the smell of mothballs?

The Drive-by Blogger said...

"Anne heche...Whatever happened to that crazy ass bitch?"

I've heard she actually has a new tv show...I will never understand show business.

"How do you eliminate the smell of mothballs?"

Some things should remain a mystery.

Jenna Howard said...

Some things should remain a mystery.

Nooooo...this information is vital. Viiii-tal. I'd really like to use that old chest. ~sigh~. You're of no use to me now.

Paul "FooDaddy" Brand said...

Let the moth get married. Presto! No more balls!

Okay, that was lame and contrived. I tried.