It would seem that my good friend, the eminent scholar Monty Dingham Smythington, has had a stroke of good luck recently. He tells me that he was hired by Bill Gates to research and translate a notebook of Leonardo da Vinci that Gates purchased for 30 million dollars in 1994. According to Monty it contains a large number of ideas for inventions that once again show how very far ahead of his time Leonardo was. Here are just a few that Monty mentioned in his letter:
An automated lice picking machine.
A steam powered escalator.
The pocket fisherman.
The Chia pet.
Nose hair trimmers.
Inflatable love dolls (gender unspecified)
The Mood Ring.
A foolproof “gaydar” machine (which Monty says was better left unfinished, as it probably would have exploded in 15th century Florence).
To be honest with you… I think that either Bill Gates really got ripped off or my old friend has started drinking again.