Friday, September 01, 2006

Like a rolling gallstone...

Well, I guess it’s official…Bob Dylan has become an old fogey. Now, it was well known that Dylan is getting old, but that’s not the same thing. Not everybody who grows old becomes an old fogey…old fogeyness is a state of mind.

As evidence of Dylan’s slide into old fogeydom, I offer the following statements taken from a recent interview:

"You listen to these modern records, they’re atrocious, they have sound all over them. There’s no definition of nothing, no vocal, no nothing, just like static."

At first it might sound like the usual cranky complaint of an aging generation on the music of a younger one, but Dylan is also reported as saying that even his records sounded better in the studio than on the disk. That pretty much renders his comments incomprehensible, which when combined with his use of the word "modern" generally means it’s old fogey time.

If you’re still not convinced, here are a few more signs that Dylan has become an old fogey:

He is always yelling at the tour bus driver to slow down.

Has been known to lecture groupies on the importance of getting enough fiber.

Not only does he think motorcycle helmets are a good idea, but believes people should wear them while riding escalators.

He says that everyone on TV is talking too fast and wearing too many bright colors…it gives him a headache.

Canceled subscription to Playboy and signed up for Readers Digest.

Has a large collection of sweater vests.


Old fogey syndrome can strike anyone and there’s no know cure…well, death eventually takes care of it, but lets hope science can come up with something less drastic.

6 comments:

Jenna Howard said...

-phew-

I'm too young for Old Fogey Syndrome but we'll talk when I'm as old as Bob Dylan...he's what? Pushing 200 now?

The Drive-by Blogger said...

That sounds about right, but hey, he doesn't look a day over 190.

Paul "FooDaddy" Brand said...

So... Dylan's becoming an Old Man, huh? Well, it's not like fogeyhood is without its benefits. He'll get to yell at children and be itchy in public.

It's what I plan to do, anyway.

Joel said...

We must find a cure...other than death, I mean.

Dan said...

His new album contains a song entitled "My Back Rages" (and it should at his age) with a classic new line that goes "Ah, but I was so much older than, and I'm even older than that now".

And how about that voice? With each new album he sounds more and more like that African wild man in that Little Rascals short ... the guy who hopped around shouting Uggabugga, Uggabugga.

The Drive-by Blogger said...

Also, I know that Dylan has always had an interest in country music...but at what point did he actually start dressing that way?