The woman in the photograph is publisher Judith Regan, who recently lost her job after agreeing to publish a controversial book by OJ Simpson and an extremely unflattering biography of baseball legend Mickey Mantle. Well, it turns out that was just the tip of the iceberg. Here are some other books she had planned to publish in the very near future…
By The Light of an Aryan Moon: a collection of little known love poems by Adolph Hitler, with a moving introduction by Mel Gibson.
The Devil Wore A Cardigan: An unauthorized “warts and all” biography of beloved children’s television icon “Mr. Rogers”. Among other things, this book alleges that Rogers would sometimes come to work drunk, start groping the female cast members while yelling, “I guess I’m Mr. McFeely today!”
Captain Eno and The New Junior Hardy Boys in: The Case of the Missing Pajamas, by Michael Jackson: This first attempt at a children’s book by the former “King of Pop” finds the grandsons of the original Hardy boys up to their prepubescent necks in trouble as they try to help the mysterious Captain Eno prove his innocence.
Thin Like Me, by Nicole Ritchie: The former “Simple Life” co-star generously shares her weight loss secrets. When asked why she wrote it Nicole said, “ I hope that even plus-sized women like Paris Hilton will be able to benefit from this book.”
Robert Blake’s Big Book of Alibis: Before finally settling on “It’ couldn’t have been me, I had gone back to the restaurant to get the gun I had left there” Blake had considered many other alibis when he was accused of shooting his wife, including:
I’m afraid of loud noises
The sight of blood makes me woozy
I permanently crippled my trigger finger back when I played “Baretta”
Any bangin’ I do with a broad don’t involve a gun, and dat’s da name of dat tune.
Sadly none of these books will now see the light of day, but I’m sure Ms. Regan will land on her feet. After all it’s hard to keep a good muckraker down.
Listed on humor-blogs.com
